One of the Best

I always thought that as I got older, losing pets would get easier.  Or maybe not easier, but more bearable, somehow.  Well, in some ways it has and in some ways it hasn’t.  Because they are still a pet, dammit, still that wet-nosed, soft-eyed face of love that greets you everyday—multiple times of day, even, [...]

This Story Ends with: “And then I had a heart attack”

A while ago I was working in the garden, setting out thick layers of newspaper and covering them with grass clippings.  I was working my way up the row, spreading & covering, spreading and covering, when something seemed out of place.  In the back of my mind, something seemed not quite right.

I kept working, spreading [...]

Shit My Guy Says: The Blaspheme Edition

Me: [Talking to the dog as she curls up adorably beside me on the couch, in that voice some dog owners use and that I swore I wouldn't ever but it turns out I just can't help myself.] Aww, are you a little lamb?  Look, she’s such a little lamb.

My Guy: She’s the Lamb of [...]

At this point the pets just kind of name themselves

My Guy: I think we should get another dog to keep Snooki company.

Me: Okay.

My Guy:  Let’s get a male boxer mix.

Me: Alright, but only if we can name him ‘The Situation.’

A Wake of Destruction

Doesn't regret a thing.

The Snook, I think, experiences the world through her mouth.

She is a nibbler of fingers, a licker of palms, a chewer of small objects.

She can spend a whole evening mouthing a piece of string or a pebble of gravel, or shredding a piece of paper into spitball-sized wads.

She enjoys tearing apart [...]

R.I.P. Finley

1997-2012

You were a damn good dog.

Except for that time when you scared the crap out of the garbageman.

And all the times when you snuck over to the neighbors’ dogs’ yards at night and stole their bones.

And that time when we accidentally left the bag of dog food open and you stuck your head in [...]

Snooki’s Socks

Snooki, it seems, has a thing for clothing.

The first time I spent the night at My Guy’s house (you know, in separate bedrooms of course) she stole my sweater.

My cashmere sweater.

In the morning I looked for it—“I know I left it right here.  But maybe it’s on a chair in the kitchen?  Or on the [...]

The Snag

Because Snooki is part Boxer and full Mutt, she has some orthodontia problems.

Here she is exhibiting her classic underbite which, though adorable, is difficult to capture on camera as she only does it while begging or concentrating very hard, and the camera makes her anxious.

Here she is exhibiting The Elvis, or Half-Snag, while begging from [...]

I Has a Hidey-Hole

Lily is a digger.

She feels the earth with her feet; she senses voles and scrabbles furiously at the dirt, sticking her nose deep into the soil.

And she has also tunneled her way underneath the poplar stump, so far that she literally disappears.

Pardon my ass, but I'm very busy digging.

This is where she hides from [...]