My Guy: Did I ever tell you about the time I found a person’s leg at the landfill?
Me: Oh my god, you found what? A leg? A human leg, like a murder victim?
My Guy: No, it was a prosthetic leg. It still had the shoe and sock on it and everything. I was like, ‘Who throws out a perfectly good leg?’
Me: So did you take it?
My Guy: Well, I was going to take it but when I picked it up the socket had, like, a lifetime of marrow caked in it and I smelled it and it smelled terrible.
Me: Why would you smell it!?
My Guy: It just looked like it needed smelling.
Me: No. Oh my god, you should never smell anything that’s at the landfill. You should’ve just taken it and washed it off.
My Guy: I know, but the smell was just too horrible. I couldn’t un-smell it.
Me: Well, I still really wish we had that leg.